New Kid On The Blog

25-FEB-2009:

A few months ago (can't remember when exactly), my uncle invited me to join this family tree website called Geni (http://www.geni.com/), and he also invited all of his brothers and sisters, their spouses and children, his cousins and their family, etc. Before I knew it, the entire 4 generations (or maybe 5) of my family were plotted in our family tree (I didn't even know I have so many relatives before this!).

Anyway, while signing up, I updated my profile with my name, DOB, etc, etc and while I was at it, I also added Saimun and Dominic to my little tree. I must have entered our wedding date as well because today I received 2 messages from my aunt and uncle wishing us Happy 6th Anniversary! According to Geni, we've just celebrated our *iron* year. In fact, I think we deserve more than iron because we had been living together for an awful long time before we got married and that ought to count, doesn't it? I don't mean awful awful but you get what I mean.

So after 6 years, I have to reflect on our relationship. First of all, I have to say my husband is a good catch. :-) Not because he's tall, dark and handsome and gorgeous, because he is not, but because of his heart and mind. I started dating him when we were both 20, and he was the most mature twenty-year-old I ever knew back then. I guess I would be attracted to older men because I like a mature and sensible mind, except that I didn't (and still don't) like old-looking men, so really he was quite perfect in that sense. I have to admit I fancied him first. Either he was very perceptive or I was damn good at giving out subtle signals and playing the seducing game without actually going all over him, and it was a really long story, but eventually we became an item.

We used to send each other loads of emails and I can still remember the time when I would be sooo looking forward to reading his emails, and I would also spend hours replying to them. By the way, I still keep all those emails and because it is our 6th wedding anniversary, I've gone and re-read some of them. The stuffs we told each other were so trivial and unimportant, such as what I ate for lunch today, how much it cost, what the stupid lecturer said and so on. However strange it may sound to some people, we hardly called each other on the phone, because remember he was (still is) a *sensible* person and he thought guys who call their girlfriends every night without fail are foolish and that they're setting themselves up for a lifetime of unreasonable expectations from their girlfriends (if they remain with the same girl in their lifetime). Besides, emails are free but phone calls aren't.

Anyway, 6 years down the road, we neither call nor email each other anymore. Even if I had wanted to, there was nothing to talk about. I don't want to tell him what I ate for lunch or how much it cost (but if one of my colleagues say or did something stupid I'll be sure to tell him about it). My point is, we're now a boring couple who doesn't do anything interesting anymore (not that we used to anyway,we just spent most our time studying in the library). We hardly even hold hands anymore when we go out, but that's only because one of us needs to push the buggy. Lengthy conversations are non-existent - but that's okay because we understand each other without saying much and he's probably the only person whom I can be with in silence without feeling uncomfortable.

Six years down the road, I have become very dependent on him.

Six years down the road, he has become my friend.

Six years down the road, he has become very, very important to me - my family.

Happy anniversary to us!

# posted by Skye @ 8:05 am 1 comments

My nephew in KL started kindergarten when he was 3 years old. The school taught him English, BM, Chinese and Maths as soon as he started. I took a look at his school books and they were mostly writing - writing ABCs, writing 123s, writing Chinese strokes. This year, he is 4+ (1 year older than Dominic) and he can already write very well. He comes home from school with homework everyday - most of the time writing or counting the objects and writing down the number. I took a look at his books again and there was add and substract as well. He seldom comes home with artwork but I guess he does some of that too. He brings an apron in his school bag because sometimes there is "cooking class". By the way, his school books are printed by Fungates - perhaps some of you have heard of it. I guess this is the type of education that an average kid in Malaysia gets when he is 3-4 years old.

At 3 years old, Dominic doesn't learn any writing at the nursery, except occassionally *if* he wants to do it then he'll scribble an 'O' or a 'snake'. He definitely does not have school books and absolutely no homework at all. He learns things like why do people eat and what food is good/bad for you, or why do birds build nests or what lives under the ground. He learns numeracy skills and ABCs too but not in a structured way using books or writing. It will be more like a game of "I spy something that begins with A" or "who can collect the most balls".

When I came back from KL (and after witnessing what my nephew learns), I asked Dom's nursery if they can allocate 10-15 mins each day for Dom to practice writing, and they said they can encourage him to do so but forcing a child to sit and write/study is not their way of teaching. I was curious and I wanted to find out if Dom is now too old for the nursery or perhaps there are other types of schools which are more *formal*. I searched but there was none - we only have nurseries (which Dom is attending) and nursery schools (which are the same as nurseries but operate only school hours, i.e. 9am - 3pm and during term time only). Dominic will start primary school in the September after his 4th birthday and only then will he begin formal education.

So for those of you who have kids around the same age, what do your kids learn in school?

# posted by Skye @ 4:51 am 0 comments

Shopping in KL is definitely more fun and easier with everything under one roof in an air-conditioned mall and underground parking. However, this year we did not do much shopping except for food items like Chinese herbs (for soup), curry mixes, instant noodle, Tom Yum cubes, Bak Kut Teh spices and mushrooms. As usual, my MIL also bought some pyjamas and underpants for Dominic. For once, I didn't buy any clothes for myself because with the current exchange rate and the UK sales (which I think is not happening anymore), it makes more sense to buy our clothes here.

I cannot decide if groceries are more expensive in M'sia but at a glance, the figures did look huge. For example, 2L of milk (labelled 'susu asli Malaysia', which means locally produced) costs RM12, whereas in the UK 4 pints (which is equivalent to about 2.3L) is only £1.44. That's only for milk, but then milk here is cheaper than water. Organic vegetables are especially expensive - RM4 for 2 skinny looking carrots. However, I guess many people probably don't cook at home, much less buy organic produce.

The first thing I did once we got back to KL was to buy some nappies for Dominic (because he still needs them at night). I tried the Mamy Poko Pants and they're the best ever nappies I've bought. I wish they're sold here because Dominic still overfills his nappy so much that it leaks almost every night, even though we made him pee before going to bed. However, I paid RM50 for 20 pieces, which means RM2.50 per piece. Over here, I don't think I've paid more than 20p per nappy.

I've also noticed that products are more varied in Malaysia. There are so many brands of milk powder it made me dizzy, and in the end still bought the wrong one because there's one with "natural" flavour and one with "honey" flavour and I got the honey flavoured one because the word "Madu" was sooo tiny. There are also so many types of shampoo and shower gel!

All in all, I LOVE shopping in M'sia. It's not crowded like Oxford Street (or Westfield nowadays), everything is under one roof, you can have a bite anytime during your shopping, the children's gym is within the same building and your husband can bring the kid there while you shop, they don't make you bring your own plastic bags, you can rent 'Kiddie Cabs' for your kids and ... and ... and ... I don't know, I just love it! Has anyone of you tried dropping your kid at the Ikea Smaland play area while you shop? It's great! We took Dominic there one day and he totally enjoyed himself (and we totally enjoyed ourselves too). We've tried bringing him to the one in London a few times but the waiting list was always a few hours! I cannot imagine where all those people came from. It was jam packed even at 10 in the morning on a weekend!

# posted by Skye @ 8:07 am 0 comments

The boys are one of the reasons why I yearn to move back to good old Tanah Melayu. I'm talking about my two nephews who gave so much joy to Dominic during our trip back. It reminded me of how my brother and I and our cousins were when we were young (Cattypants one of us). We were inseparable (whenever we weren't separated by the long distance between Ipoh and JB). It was almost unbearable when we had to be separated for a few hours because I needed to attend my piano class or when she had to go to church (I don't remember why she didn't drag me to church with her). Bedtime was most dreaded because there weren't enough hours in a day for us to be together, but at least we slept in the same room, two person squeezed into one single bed. I'm not sure if you remember this, couz - we refused to close our eyes and stayed up until we couldn't bear it anymore, and even got caught once or twice. The boys reminded me of all these.

The boys will do Saimun and I good as well. One of the nights, Dom slept over at their place and it felt really good to have one night to ourselves. It was the first time he spent a night away from daddy AND mummy.

No doubt, there were bad influences from the boys as well. For example, Dom has now learnt to hit another person. He has also learnt to fake-cry loudly (with tears, actually) when he doesn't get his way - something which I believe he picked up from WS.

During our stay, Dom was also exposed to Ben 10 and "alien forces", whereas all along his TV programmes were all educational and non-violent. One day, after an "alien show", all three boys were running around the house shouting "I'm the alien!", "No, I'm the bigger alien!", "I'm going to eat you!". I'm not sure if it was the same night or several nights later that Dom screamed in his sleep - like how you would scream if someone on high-heels stepped on your bare toes - and he started to cry, repeating "It's so scary! It's so scary!". He had nightmares before this but none as *severe* as this. Later, when I talked to him about it, he said he saw a lizard, not an alien. I wondered if he could've seen a real lizard but I don't recall seeing a single lizard in the house during the 3 weeks we stayed there.

It was on the same afternoon the boys played the "alien game" that the following conversation took place after I gave Dom a shower:

Me: Quickly put on your pants, otherwise the alien will bite your "jiao-jiao".

Joe: Eh ... how come your "jiao-jiao" is so small?

Me: Is it? Is yours bigger?

Joe: (Nodded)

Dom: Show me. Let me see. (Joe was fully clothed)

Joe: (Took off his pants and showed Dom his birdie)

Dom: Emm ... it's bigger. I wanna check Wing Sern's (and he ran off to find Wing Sern).

During those 3 weeks, we saw my MIL and the boys' parents dealt with problems that we know someday we'll face, such as refusing to go to school, refusing to do homework and lying (for example, can't go to school because the leg is painful). When the time comes for me, I'm not sure how I will deal with it but at least daddy and I have talked about our general approach. The conversation was very short:

Him: If you don't feel like going to work, what can I do to motivate you? Whack you?

Me: (Paused for a moment, thinking) Hmm ... okay.

I like to think that we're sooo connected that we totally understood each other without saying any more. :-D

Apart from having fun together, the boys fought as well - fighting for toys or someone accidentally hurting the other. Most of the time, it was so noisy and chaotic when the 3 of them were together that it was a relief when the holidays were over and the two boys went back to school (one morning and the other afternoon session).

# posted by Skye @ 5:54 am 0 comments

This year, there were people that I really wanted to see but didn't manage to, and there were people that are not so important to me whom I saw instead. There were people whom I didn't see because of the lack of time and effort.

I thought CNY is a time for getting together with relatives - some of which we probably see only once a year during this auspicious occassion. However, Saimun's family does not have the habit of visiting friends and relatives during CNY. Neither did their friends and relatives come over except for a few of them. I've been married to the Chim family for about 5 years now and I still don't know all of their extended family members although there aren't many of them. Some I know by face but have forgotten their names. I'm also not sure who is whose son and which ones are married. Most embarassingly, after so many years, I'm still not sure who should be receiving ang pows from me. I guess I'm just a person who doesn't pay attention to these details and the fact that I hardly see them doesn't help either.

I was supposed to meet up with my school friends but I bailed out the last minute because of various reasons (or you may say excuses). We've been talking about it weeks leading to the event but because of the last minute change of venue, it made it more difficult for us to go since I was planning on getting my FIL to send us (if it was around PJ). Another reason (excuse) was our very packed schedule. We met up with a lawyer in the morning and we had another appointment later that evening and I wanted Dominic to take his afternoon nap before the evening appointment. Like I said, these are all excuses. The main reason was the location and our lack of own transport. Of all the gatherings that I had, this would have been the best one but I missed it, although I can't blame anyone but myself. This would be the one that Dominic would enjoy the most. These are my friends who are mostly married and with kids.

We met up with a few friends and the conversation was always the same - how is it in the UK, how the economy is so bad and when we mentioned that we wanted to go back for good, how it is not advisable to do so because of the job, money, cost of living, etc. Later, during our long flight back to London, Saimun and I talked about it and we concluded that for most (not all) of the people that we met, money is at the top of their priority list. These are our friends who are either not married, just married or just started a family.

I also met up with my ex-colleagues and I couldn't help feeling that my life is so different from theirs. I suppose most of them do not have a family yet so their main objective is career development and they do not mind having to work late and to bring home work during the weekends. I'm so far away from that - me who bakes during her free time and leaves her laptop in the office. Sadly, I found that I couldn't contribute much to their conversation anymore. These are my friends who made fun of the Malay/government workers who leave the office at 5pm. These are my friends who are mostly not married or have no kids.

We had our annual pot luck gathering with my university mates too, and honestly, I enjoyed this one the most! It was the most meaningful, honest (at least I felt that it was) and open. The only downside is that Saimun was most of the time half-asleep (I think) because of the lack of any male companion. Perhaps this is the only group of friends who didn't talk about money. These are our friends who are unique. Unique because I can't find anything common between us. Come to think of it, perhaps the only reason we got together was because we speak the same language.

# posted by Skye @ 6:32 am 0 comments

With daddy's initiative, we spent CNY away from home this year, at a beach resort in Batu Ferringhi Penang. To avoid the *massive traffic jam* that everyone warned us about, we set off at 6am on CNY eve but with luck the journey was smooth.

We went up in two cars - daddy, yeh-yeh, ma-ma, Dominic and myself in one and my brother-in-law's family (including Dominic's favourite Joe and WS) in another. All throughout the journey, if Dominic wasn't asleep, he would ask about Joe Joe and Wing Sern. When they were finally reunited in Penang, Dominic ran over and gave them a bigggg hug as if they had not seen each other for years.

We spent the next two days swimming and playing by the beach. We had our reunion dinner in the hotel and daddy won a lucky draw - complimentary Indian Cuisine for 2 - which we gave to my uncle who lives in Penang.

We put on our bright red new clothes on the 1st day of CNY and had a very satisfying hotel breakfast. It was a merry CNY since there was lion dance and 'Choy San Yeh' at the hotel lobby. The 'Choy San Yeh' could've been a Malay or something because he couldn't understand anything I said and he didn't speak a single word. The ang-moh 'Choy San Yeh' we met in London last year was even more convincing than that.

After that, of course it was swimming time - something that the kids had been bugging us about since the night before.

The next day, we headed down to Ipoh to meet my grandmother.

This year we received a lot of ang pows on behalf of Dominic, but we also gave out a big amount. Anyway, questions:

1) How much in general do you give in an ang pow?

2) Do you give ang pows to your unmarried friends who are older or around the same age as you?

3) Do you give ang pows to your younger siblings who are married?

4) Do you give ang pows to your older siblings who are not married?

# posted by Skye @ 6:52 am 0 comments

I think we were hungry the moment we touched down at the airport. After we dropped our luggages at home and had a

nice shower we headed to 'Tang House of Fishball' at Sea Park - recommended by my in-laws. The place was clean and

most importantly air-conditioned. They serve Hakka noodles with minced meat, fishballs, fish cakes, etc. I'm not sure if it was because we were hungry but the food certainly tastes good. If you search 'Tang Fishball Sea Park' on Google, you'll get quite a number of hits, but here's one for you with lovely photos (http://eatinout.blogspot.com/2006/08/tang-house-of-fishball-sea-park.html).

Once seated, we looked around and noticed other patrons slurping from huge bowls and so we made the assumption that the serving would be large. Besides, the price listed on the menu was for RM6.50 per bowl of noodle. As you would have guessed by now, it was a mistake because there wasn't even enough for Dominic!

Later that night, we had 'Lou Sang' and seafood at 'Pantai Seafood' restaurant at Kampung Kayu Ara (in PJ). We ate here twice this year - once with family and once with Raymond (our friend). It was said that the food is good and cheap.

The days after that, we had 'Lou Sang' with this friend and 'Lou Sang' with that relative and etc, etc. By the 6th time we had 'Lou Sang', I was pretty sick of it and Dom had become quite expert in tossing with the chopsticks. :-D Not only was I sick of 'Lou Sang' but I was also sick of seafood and Chinese cuisine, so much so that when we met up with my uncle for dinner on the 9th day of CNY, we had Mexican food at Chilli's instead.

I'm not sure what happened but there wasn't enough time (or space in the stomach) for curry mee, satay, chicken rice, laksa, fried kuey teow and I'm not sure what else I've missed. We also didn't have Har Mee but we imported the 'Ibumie Instant Har Mee' with us when we came back (this is the one recommended by Cattypants). We had it for breakfast on Sunday (the day after we came back) and it was delicious! Dominic said that it was a little bit 'lat' (spicy) but he finished his. I thought it was more than *a little bit* 'lat'.

Another good and cheap restaurant that we frequented is 'King Crab' situated along the LDP opposite the Kelana Jaya LRT station (http://www.kingcrab.com.my). Their signature dishes are of course crabs but I would like to try everything in their menu because so far nothing we ordered were disappointing. The menu comes illustrated with saliva-inducing photos of the dishes.

This year, I'm glad we had KFC - yes - Kentucky Fried Chicken which was about 5 times better than the ones in the UK. Sadly, the ones here taste nothing but like eating salt.

For our reunion dinner this year, we had Mongolian Steamboat & BBQ at Holiday Inn Hotel Batu Ferringhi Penang - the first time we had our reunion dinner away from home. The food was only so-so (hotel standard) but it was certainly great not having to do any washing up after dinner.

Hotel breakfast in Malaysia is sooo much better than the ones in the UK or Europe. In the UK, there's the typical English breakfast (if you're lucky), otherwise it would just be bread, plain croissant and cheese, whereas in Malaysia (Holiday Inn Penang), we had nasi lemak, mee hoon, various types of eggs, waffles, even rendang and sambal sotong and everything you would get in an English and continental breakfast. There was even rice porridge with 'yau char kwai' and also 'Kuey Teow' soup. The variety was a bit overwhelming.

Another restaurant worth mentioning is the 'Damansara Palace Restaurant' (http://dpalace.com.my/main.html) - which is like your typical Tai Thong or Overseas restaurant. We had dinner here on my MIL's birthday. The food had a certain quality to it but most noticeable was the excellent service. I liked that the tables were spaced quite far away from each other, unlike the normally crowded ones with hardly any space to walk.

On the 2nd day of CNY, we had dinner with my grandmother and uncles/aunts/cousins. My grandmother called this the 'Hoi Nin' dinner and the venue is the same every year, i.e. the Tai Thong restaurant at Heritage Hotel Ipoh. Eating out in Ipoh during the CNY is challenging. The restaurants run two *shifts* per evening, normally with the first shift at 6:30pm and the 2nd shift at 8pm, which means that if yours is the first shift you will have to eat quickly and be out of the place before 8pm. Dishes would be served so quickly that you would have to ask the kitchen to slow down - which happened to us this year even though we took the 8pm shift. And because my grandmother was considered a 'valued customer' (according to my uncle who could be boasting), we managed to get a room.

Eating out (for brunch) in Ipoh the next morning was even more challenging! Every restaurant was overfilled. Further more, there were 16 of us including kids which made it the more impossible for us to get a table (or tables because there wasn't one table which could accomodate all of us). It took strategy. We spread out over the restaurant and with sharp eyes and quick move, grabbed a table as soon as someone left it. We were so good at it that we managed to get 4 tables all next to each other (probably with a little bit of luck as well :p).

# posted by Skye @ 5:32 am 0 comments

Every year, I will need to get a new SIM card because the old one will expire if I don't top up within 30 days (or 60 days or whatever it is) - a prepaid SIM card that is. This year, Maxis has launched Hotlink 365, i.e. RM33 subscription fee to keep the line activated for 365 days. And so we subscribed to Hotlink 365 and next year my number shall not change. Now, my MIL is using the number so please don't try calling me. :p

While we were at the mobile phone shop, daddy enquired about 'SIM unlock'. He has collected many mobile phones now since the contract he signed up with the mobile operator entitles him to a new phone each year. So now, his dad has a *new* phone and so does his mum. While we were at it, we asked about iPhone SIM unlock as well. Now, the 'guy' told us that it will cost RM300 to unlock an iPhone 3G. And in case you forgot, I bought an iPhone 3G about a month ago and sold it to my brother-in-law. He successfully cracked it and is now very proud of himself *grin*. He is now thinking he might have a side business going for him.

Now, the question is should I get another iPhone for myself? I like it but it's not a necessity.

Speaking of phone numbers again, I noticed that almost half of my friends have changed their mobile number (apparently they wanted to save money by moving to a cheaper mobile provider). I made the mistake of SMS-ing them instead of calling (because I wanted to save money too - SMS is cheaper :p) and then only realized much later that they have changed their number when they didn't reply. I wonder when Malaysians can keep their number even when they move to another service provider, like in the UK. Speaking of that, I came across a 'U-Mobile' booth at Mid Valley and my brother told me that it's a new mobile provider and I think it allows you to keep your number when you switch. Does anyone know anything about this?

# posted by Skye @ 8:59 am 0 comments